Freddie Fackelbag

There is pretty much only one photo of Whitney Port's upcoming "City" love interest Freddie Fackelmayer to be found on the internet and this is a glorious thing. Because the camera doesn't lie, folks, and either do I. I've seen this guy twice in person: once at a crowded charity function (he was following Whitney and the cameras were following them) and a second time in Montauk, which is appropriate seeing as his friends-via commentary on nymag.com-assure the general public his tan [basted turkey complexion] comes the natural way, courtesy of early morning shred sessions in Ditch Plains (natch!). Dude has bone structure-and height-to spare. He's also supposedly a NICE PERSON. I doth not protest this fact. But simple things can push even the nicest, prettiest of people from hott surfer into dbagdom, and Cheeto face is one of these things. He's making his "City" debut next week, and the previews are blindingly tan. In person it's overwhelming, to say the least. I'm talking white shirt under a black light overwhelming. So FF: You're chasing swells, ripping and being gharly, wearing items of clothing that zip up the back, fine. Let's slather on some sunblock, shall we? Happy to help.